Guest Post By- Wynne Leon
I was listening to an On Being podcast where Krista Tippett was interviewing American humorist and storyteller Kevin Kling. He was born with a disabled arm and then in mid-life was in a motorcycle accident that paralyzed his other arm.
He was talking about the PTSD that came with his accident. With it came anger and inability to sleep and when it resurfaced with a vengeance years after the accident he was talking to his therapist about it.
She said that he needed to retell the story with a different ending – tell the story as if he didn’t hit the car and he reached his destination. He did that and it worked! He was able to sleep again. His takeaway was: “We need to rewrite our story sometimes just so we can get some sleep.”
That line caught me by the throat and hasn’t let go. Because it means that our bodies believe our own storytelling. It means that while I think a storyteller is someone like Kevin Kling, it is actually my own storytelling that matters most.
It means that the most influential person in my life isn’t my boss, my loved ones, a beloved actor or author, or even Oprah Winfrey – it’s me.
So I’ve pondered the stories I tell myself. The two most cataclysmic things that have happened in the past ten years of my life are when someone told me of the infidelities of my husband I’d been married to for eight years and the marriage fell apart.
Then once I was divorced, I choose to have kids on my own as a single parent. Someone said to me when my firstborn was about 6 months old, “I wish that he [my ex-husband] hadn’t wasted so much of your time.” And I replied something like, “It’s okay, that marriage and its downfall got me to meditation and where I needed to be.”
I rewrote the story of heartbreak and loss as the impetus to put me on my current path with these two beautiful children I love dearly. I believe that the Divine has used all of the past to get me where I needed to be which I genuinely believe to be true. But it is also a story that helps me be very happy where I am instead of mourning what I’ve lost.
In talking about the story he’s rewritten so that he can sleep, Kevin Kling said that of course he wakes up every morning and has to contend with the fact that his arms don’t work as a result of the fact that the accident did really happen.
Stories can’t change the circumstances of our lives, but they do change how we relate to those circumstances. Knowing this I’m carefully checking my current inventory of stories to make sure I’m telling myself the right ones!
About Guest Author– Wynne Leon is an optimist, an enthusiast of endurance sports, and a woman intent on charting her own path. Which is a combination that has led to an unconventional life. When she was younger life of adventure meant climbing mountains, traveling the world, and being an entrepreneur. More recently, it’s been starting a family as a single parent at age 46, having another child at age 50, and adopting a highly-strung kitten, even though she really is a dog person. Her writing projects include technical computer manuals, articles about meditation and parenting, and Finding My Father’s Faith, a memoir about spirituality, solace, and her relationship with her beloved father.
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A powerful, inspiring post! 👌 Deep!
Thank you for the comment! May all your stories serve you for good!
So inspiring post and beautiful family photo 👌🌷The words of this article marvellous ♥️🌹👍🏻
Thank you so much!
A great Post. I had to honestly journey back through my life to unravel what I was seeking and accept what WAS but aLo came to understand that when I acknowledged that I......my wants desires etc had to align up with what was best for others did I truly find happiness and fulfillment. Faith became then my LIGHT in all darkness for all peoples.
Beautifully said, Faye! Thank you for sharing that light!
Wynne, an inspiring story. I became a single mother when my husband died, leaving me to raise our two adopted children who suffered from fetal alcohol syndrome. I don't think I would have had the courage to opt for single parenthood. Lovely photo of you and your children. <3
Wow, Cheryl, that must have been so hard to grieve and raise two kids. What a journey it must have been and I bet it took some brave storytelling to get yourself and those two kids through that. Thank you for your kind words!
Motivational and inspiring guest post! ♥️
Thank you, Ashish!
Thank you for sharing! 😊
what a great example with such resilience in writing your own story Wynne! love it!!!💖💖💖
Thank you, Cindy!! I love your enthusiasm!! <3 <3 <3
You're soooo welcome and thanks! I'm so glad. 💖💖💖
The lesson of this post is especially relevant to those struggling with mental health! I know with my struggles with depression, I often fall into the rut of telling myself the wrong kind of the stories - stories that reinforce a bad state of mind and a negative outlook for the future. Changing the narrative is critical to healing.
I love this comment, Tressa! When you say changing the narrative is critical to healing, it definitely rings true for the tough times in my life. Wishing you empowering and refreshing stories...
Very interesting and uplifting post- I'll be sure to check out the his blog!
Thank you, Pooja!
Powerpackt and thought provoking
Thank you for the nice comments!
Mine pleasure dear. If you don't mind plz visit my writing I want your opinions
This is very inspiring. Our brains believe whatever we tell it, so if we're constantly feeding it a negative story, it makes sense that it would affect us. I like this idea of changing the story.
I agree, Kathy! If we are all telling ourselves stories to begin with, might as well make it a conscious process and change the narrative!! Thanks so much for reading!
I love this story and am envious of the talented writing skill.
Wow, what a wonderful compliment! Thank you so much, Dennis!
I'm taking away from this post "We need to rewrite our story sometimes just so we can get some sleep.” Thank you for a great share.
I love that line too! Thank you so much for your comment!
Very encouraging!!!!
Thank you, Dee!
Thank you for sharing this, Wynne. I can relate. Just knowing that it is we who get to interpret our story--to make of it what we will--is very empowering. When I went through my divorce, at first I thought that it was only bad; but that, of course, is only what I was labelling it. Now, it just is. It's also taken me to greater awareness, for which I am very grateful.
I like how you put it, Art! Greater awareness is a good outcome of even the hardest events! Thanks for reading and commenting!
Thank you, Wynne. I agree--greater awareness is a good outcome! Looking forward to your next post!