I’m Sorry! isn’t the most disheartening word? The 5 letter word may hurt our EGO and makes us embarrass in front of the world at large, or humiliate us. Right?

As people always think saying sorry is a sign of embarrassment. But you know what? saying sorry isn’t only for apologies or wrongdoings. It is something more than that. I have experienced this 5 letter word “sorry” is more powerful than any other word. It is a magic wand that can build a relationship so impregnable and perhaps more powerful than Gorilla wood Glue.

Before going further I want to confess a bitter truth and an eye-opener event of my life when I realize the significance of the word “I’m Sorry”. Before the demise of my father, I had a war of words on a certain gibberish topic and for that, we didn’t talk to each other for a couple of days. And maybe because of my Ego, I didn’t want to take the first step to clear all misunderstandings between us. I want my father to do so.

But there is something deep inside me that was compelling me to apologize, putting my ego and frustration aside. And the time I realized my mistake it was already too late, that person was not with me anymore to whom I could say “I’m Sorry”. But that left the biggest guilt to think about for the rest of my life.

The problem doesn’t lie with the word “Sorry”, the problem lies with “EGO” (a person’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance), which is greater than anything around you. But Self respect is completely different from the Ego.

It’s the Ego that creates problems/issues in every relationship whether spouses, friends, Colleagues or it is not wrong if I say that even religions.

What is EGO psychology?

woman in white dress shirt and black pants sitting on gray couch
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According to Sigmund Freud(an Australian neurologist), the ego is the psychological component of the personality that is represented by our conscious decision-making process, our ego is always determined by our behavior, it has three parts ID, Ego, Super Ego. let us have a brief explanation:-

  • ID:- It is the inherited (biological) component of personality present within us from birth, which response directly to our basic urges, needs, and desires. ID is infantile remains throughout life, doesn’t alter with time and life experiences, ID achieves its demands we experience pleasure but when it is denied we experience ‘displeasing’ or tension.
  • Super Ego:- It comprises moral values of society which is learned from one person to another, its function is to control the id’s impulses, those which society prohibits and not allow, such as sex and aggression.
  • Ego:- It is a person’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance, “that part of the id which has been modified by the direct influence of the external world. Ideally, it is concerned with the decision-making component of personality. It greatly influences you when you meet the external world with their social-norms and their realities.

Now the question arises that why EGO is mentioned?

As mentioned above, ego relates to our self-esteem and pride, it makes our self-respect Whereas Apologies or asking for forgiveness is a kind of guilt that demoralizes us and it feels like it is defaming us.

But I think no, there are a few other points that make the relationship stronger and help in increasing understanding.

Why Is It Hard To Say Sorry?

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  • Sorry seems to prove us wrong and hurts our sentiments which indirectly affect our self-respect. And that’s what most of us think.
  • Sorry makes us responsible for the incidence and may let us down in the world at large, like when any misunderstanding happens in the border of two countries and no one will admit their fault unless they suffer a huge loss.
  • Sorry seems to make us weak in front of our rivalry or our partner, because self-esteem is our first priority.
  • Assumptions that if we apologize may the person will pardon or what he/she will think about us?

Why Is It Important to Say Sorry?

  1. Sorry helps in restoring the decorum of the hurt person and develops empathy towards the offender.
  2. Sorry helps in reviving the trust and starts developing an understanding, and your flaws will overlook and virtues will highlight.
  3. It is a natural medicine to make the relationship stronger.
  4. It helps in making your self-respect and will develop the ability to move further briskly.
  5. Sorry helps in resolving the guilt. But in my case, it was too late. Hope you’ll not repeat that.

Saying Sorry doesn’t mean that you are wrong, it only means that you value the person more than being right.

gaur gopal Das

If you really love someone, admire them from the deepest point of your heart. A little step of compromising with your Ego can save a beautiful relationship, and again like new flower blossoms after the autumn, your relationship will be filled with the fragrance of understanding. I wish I could understand this much early.

My father has given me a piece of advice that if you are wrong always be kind but if you are not you have to be more kind, don’t be too tough in life because a straight tree is always trimmed first but a bowed tree is always avoided because the feller assumes it worthless but in reality, the bowed tree which is filled with fruits not only save himself but also fills other life with joy and has welcomed by everyone.

sticky note with apology
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Dear reader, If you get what I want to say then go ahead and try once the magical word of 5 letters “SORRY”. And yes don’t forget to put a smile on your face.

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